And it happened again. Usually, when someone sends me a connection request on LinkedIn, I accept it without any due diligence and send them a nice hello, which goes something (though not exactly every time) like this:
Thank you for inviting me to be part of your professional network.
If you landed here after reading my post on XYZ, I would love to hear your thoughts about that subject. If not, I’m curious to know why you thought adding me would be a good idea. Is there something we can collaborate on, or did my profile just appear interesting enough for you to add me? Also, let me know how I can help.
Mostly, people either ignore it (which is silly enough, given they sent me the request to begin with, and what point is being part of a network if you won’t engage?) or say something mildly relevant (quite acceptable, too, since we can’t all be epigrammists). Once in a while, though, I’ll get someone engaging actively. And then, we become friends. They are my Murarilals, eh, sorry, Isabhais.
Rarely, I’ll get someone rude who will say something on the lines of, “By connecting with me, I have not permitted you to send me unsolicited messages,” even though (1) it was THEM who requested the connect and so the message isn’t strictly unsolicited, and (2) this is a professional network, with both words being important (we are all here to advance our “professional” careers by collaborating, and it is a place to, not to put too fine a point on it, “network”).
Today, I got a passive-aggressive chap who started sharing his posts (via links) with me instead of answering my simple question. When I asked him what it was about, he said that since I thought I was entitled to share the link to my XYZ post with him, instead of engaging, he thought he’d “teach me a lesson on how it feels.”
No wait, what?
My dear friend, whatever you are angry about or whatever you are compensating for, I am not responsible for it. I wish you well. But frankly, I don’t need that sort of negativity in my life. So, I am sorry, but I must block you. I know you are a hotshot startup CEO with a billion-dollar valuation. But if you have such thin skin that merely being asked a polite and conversational question by the person you specifically and voluntarily chose to add to your network makes you feel that person is intruding on your personal space, I think we are both better off without each other. What say you?
So, thank you. Once again, I wish you well. I hope you find your own Anand soon.
Later edit: What’s even more interesting, nay fascinating, about it is that all such aggression comes from men. Women are the sweetest, most polite, most conversational people I’ve come across. Which is surprising, isn’t it, given how it is them that mostly bear the brunt of unsolicited DMs?
