If I see one more post
about how DeepSeek’s launch
wasn’t just a breakthrough in AI,
but a lesson in resilience and leadership,
I will conduct a root cause (or is it root canal? Equally painful) analysis
on why LinkedIn influencers have the self-awareness of a broken chatbot.
Because, of course, DeepSeek
isn’t just a technological achievement.
No, it’s a case study in stakeholder engagement,
a north star for business transformation,
a roadmap for next-gen talent acquisition.
Somewhere, someone wrote a post
about how its training efficiency
inspired them to rethink onboarding.
Another has leveraged its strategic implications
to crack the art of client retention.
And let’s not forget the thought leaders
who have unpacked its deeper meaning,
claiming its $6 million price tag
proves that true innovation doesn’t require infinite resources
just the right mindset.
(Yes, because access to a billion-dollar GPU farm in China
is like bootstrapping your side hustle
from a co-working space in Indiranagar.)
And, of course,
this isn’t just about AI.
It’s about redefining leadership in the age of disruption,
adapting to change with an AI-first approach,
DeepSeek’s efficiency as a lesson in personal productivity.
(Are you taking time management tips from a neural network?)
Meanwhile, actual markets
have shed over a trillion dollars
as investors realised that OpenAI, Google, Meta, and Anthropic,
not to mention Nvidia
got their margins (and their outlandish claims) kneecapped
by a Chinese research team led by a 29-year-old PhD student
who wasn’t trying to destroy Silicon Valley’s business model
—just making trades.
But sure, Karen from HR,
tell me how this validated your approach to conflict resolution.
And then, there’s the AI poets of LinkedIn,
weaving wisdom out of thin air,
telling me DeepSeek isn’t just about AI…
It’s about Aai.
Yes. Because apparently
Indians say Aai first,
and so are genetically predisposed to understand AI.
(Does this mean Germans are born experts in tax law,
the French with sommelier training,
and Americans emerge holding firearms
and copyright lawsuits?)
And so, here we are,
watching the corporate LinkedIn complex
grind this into more soulless content,
each post more hollow,
each insight more AI-generated,
each conclusion more profoundly idiotic.
(Everything on LinkedIn is a competition
including how vacuously profound one can sound
on a trending topic, to piggyback on virality.
Begani shaadi? Meet Mr A Diwana!)
So, if I see one more post
about how DeepSeek transformed leadership,
and boiled the ocean,
I swear to dog
I, too, shall take decisive action.
I shall leverage key takeaways,
and unlock operational efficiencies
by setting my laptop, mobile, and router on fire,
watching them pivot into a blazing centres of excellence,
and calling it a deconstructed framework of hot buttons.
Thereby regaining (or is it retaining?) my will to live.
AAAAAAARGH!
