One would have thought that after years and years of constant, daily practice, Indian VCs would have mastered the art of saying a firm, yet polite no. Obviously, practice doth not make perfection, unlike the proverb.
Apparently, this is not limited to them but is generally an Indian/subcontinental trait. It probably has something to do with our culture that we find it very difficult to refuse someone on their face, and more so, refuse it without losing dignity or civility (on both sides) or coming across as arrogant or pompous.
Instead, we tend to refuse calls, stonewall, ghost, and/or indulge in activities that make us come across as exactly the kind of people we are trying to avoid the other party from thinking we are. And those that do say a firm no, somehow have not learnt to do so without being rude, reminding me of the cliché about people who begin their sentences with, ‘With all due respect…’ and then go on to do exactly the opposite, i.e., disrespect the person they are addressing. So, you end up with one of two kinds of refusals: those that simply stop communicating with you, leaving you confused and wondering if it was something you said or did, or if they are really very busy and will get back in time; or those that say no so rudely that it leaves you humiliated and feeling small.
What is your opinion on the matter? Do you think this trait is unique to us Indians or are there other cultures where this is observed? Why do you think this is the case? What do you think someone at the receiving end of this (either a not-no-not-yes, or a rude no) should do?
